loving the before

I am constantly bombarded with before and after pictures – before the diet, after the diet; before the hair cut, after the hair cut; before the fitness regime, after the fitness regime, on and on it goes. I love the after picture. It usually demonstrates hard work and tenacity and I am in awe of the people who have been dedicated to do what it takes to get to that ‘after’ stage. 

I am in a wheelchair, and unless a miracle occurs, this is it.

I don’t have an after picture. What do I do?

 Genesis 1v1: “In the beginning God…” God is in the before. He is in my before and He loves my before even if at this time there is no after. If He loves it, then who am I to hate it? I have had to learn to love the before.

I cant help thinking that the bigger miracle is loving the before.


Truths from my Sat Nav – part 5

INSTRUCTION NUMBER 5: Please make a u-turn

This is when you know you’ve really messed up. Sally usually tells me this when I have gone as far as I can go based on my own knowledge and it has done nothing more but get me even more lost. Doesn’t this sound familiar in our own lives when it comes to following God? We go the way we think we know then we end up more lost than ever, then we decide to listen to the voice that knew the right way all along. We need to make a u-turn! We need to admit we went down the wrong road, made the wrong decision, said the wrong words, hurt people, damaged ourselves and grieved his heart.

The thing about a sat nav is that it begins to re-direct you from the very point of your lostness. It doesn’t make you go all the way back to the start or wait until you find your way onto a familiar road. It takes you right from where you are. God does exactly the same. He loves you right in your lostness and will come to you right where you are and lead you from there.

God is a master at taking lost people and making them found again. He is expert at taking broken hearts and making them whole again.

As the hymn writer so eloquently put it:

“I once was lost but now I am found

I was blind but now I see” (John Newton, ‘Amazing Grace’).

INSTRUCTION NUMBER 6: You have arrived at your destination

And so you arrive…or do you?

After every turn in the road you arrive where you were always meant to be only to realise that there is another destination to make your way to. Sure, you may stay here for a while but inevitably you will move on, even from here.

After lot of journeying, wandering and wondering, these words are starting to truly define my life:

“It the end it was the walking that made all the difference. It took arriving, always arriving, to finally understand that it was never about where I ended up, but only how I got there. I hope I never get to where I am going” (Tyler Knott Gregson).

We will arrive, only to leave again and arrive somewhere else.

long road ahead